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Ingathering
A tiny mouse
built her house
next to the hearty cornfield.
Come summer days
she plans buffets
and gleans the season's yield.
She picks corn
at crack of morn
then boils a pot of water.
With a shout
without a doubt
invites everyone and their daughter.
Crowds arrive
at half past five
with salt and melted butter.
By ten till six,
bellies like bricks,
they're all too stuffed to utter.
Now banquet ended
and waists extended,
the sluggish rise to roam.
They leave the house
of tiny mouse
to slowly wander home.
Through bitter cold
of winter's hold
the field is void of maize.
But tiny mouse
in her warm house
reaps thoughts of summer days.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
A little ditty about harvesting friendship.
L
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Candlewitch
Mon, 2023-10-30 16:11
dear Lavender,
I was wondering if there should be a space between In Gathering?
I really enjoyed your tale of a mouse and her generosity. very cute!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Lavender
Mon, 2023-10-30 17:06
Hello, Cat!
Nope! :) Ingathering is all one word. I've been writing such serious, deep poetry as of late, I came up for air with this one. I appreciate you taking the time to read.
Thank you!
L
Candlewitch
Mon, 2023-10-30 17:26
Lol,
thanks for furthering my education...never too old to learning something new!
*love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Lavender
Mon, 2023-10-30 17:37
I know what you mean!
LOL
xxx
Ruby Lord
Tue, 2023-10-31 06:51
Your poem is wonderful, it
Your poem is wonderful, it transported me back to being a five-year-old, each word painted vivid pictures in my mind. It was delightful, and heartwarming. What really captivated me was the mouse and her friends human characteristics. Thank you for this exquisite piece. I loved it. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Lavender
Tue, 2023-10-31 10:33
Hello, Ruby,
Seems I've written so many bitter poems lately, I wanted to pass along a little TLC.
Thank you for your very kind words!
L
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-11-04 16:25
Hi L
I somehow missed this delightful little poem. I love the format and the lightheartedness. I can just see the little mouse bustling around and working hard around her little house. As always, an enjoyable read that brought a smile to my face with it's kind language and simplicity.
~RoseBlack~
Lavender
Sat, 2023-11-04 20:45
Hello, Carrie,
Sometimes something not quite so serious takes shape. I'm so glad you enjoyed this! Thank you for reading!
L
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-11-04 20:50
Sometimes
Lightheartedness is needed! I really enjoy these simple numerous writes. It breathes fresh air into all the stuff going on in the world today.
~RoseBlack~