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Divinity and Cowardice (Yellow)
Golden disc of warmth and light
Goes arcing ‘cross the sky
Before approaching it’s nadir
And bids the day goodbye
Sustain this hefty host of life
Shine after the flood
Ancient cultures worshiped you
The first of all the gods
All your shiny happiness
Appearing every day
Bowing to a golden moon
Who’s glowing in your rays
Just like life, another side
Duality so clear
Bright and warm have counterpoint
Their names are doubt and fear
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Candlewitch
Wed, 2022-07-13 10:01
dear Tim,
I really can get into Mother Earth Lore. I love the elements! it is the duality of all (things) that they learn to co-exist with the other half. (like i co-exist with eddy styx) lol. seriously, your poem is lovely. reminding us of the duality of all things! thank you for this. thank you for these lines:
Just like life, another side
Duality so clear
Bright and warm have counterpoint
Their names are doubt and fear
respects. Cat
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RoseBlack
Wed, 2022-07-13 22:29
Fantastic
The elemental piece and the way you worked the sun and moon, night and day into emotions like bright and warm, doubt and fear was great. The flow and use of language rolls right off the readers tongue and leaves them with something to think about. Another fantastic piece.
~RoseBlack~