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The Yield of my Bequeathal
To my parents I give crazy "props"
for putting up with me,
they provided great examples
which gave me integrity.
I also thank my siblings
for when push came down to shove,
they made me a better person
each combining to teach me, love;
and from then on I was willing
to share myself with all my friends,
giving me true substance
instead of following the trends;
which made all the difference
in the way I shared my heart,
had I better learned my lessons
my loves with me would not have part.
But, to God I leave my legacy
and in my heart of hearts I'd pray,
I lived for all a good example
by leading no one else astray.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words:
Something very prevalent on my "secret mind", that not only had to be clarified.......but, very importantly and explicitly HAD to be said....before 'twas too late.
Everybody SING, now!
I love all of your collective lives.......individually, AND together!
Thanx for making my pen "twitch"!
docmaverick.
Editing stage:
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Comments
weirdelf
Thu, 2012-02-23 07:02
sorry, but trite
Real people make their own choices of goodness and integrity.
Doc, when will you stop writing Hallmark poems?.
cheers,
Jess
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