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Never fuck with an elf
Never fuck with an elf
for we are subtle and quick to anger.
Wot?!
bloody lie!
We use subtlety if needs be,
as a means to any end.
we'll break dodo eggs to make our omelettes
You wonder why the dinosaurs died?
One farted in my general direction
The plagues of Egypt?
the pharoah dissed my poetry
The fall of the Roman empire?
Nero played badly
but if you really piss me off
I make it slow
lingering and painful
like the death of capitalism.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
magics02
Thu, 2011-10-06 22:44
Tats right mate
no messing with an elf as the knomes do not like that:)
Jess your poetry is starting to tell your very own story now. I like that. How do I critique this, well too darn tired to check it out:) Funny stuff
Mona
weirdelf
Thu, 2011-10-06 23:18
gnomes (sic) like fucking with elves
they wish!
Glad to know you got an insight into the real me. Have you read "Flaneur"?
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
magics02
Thu, 2011-10-06 23:45
No I will go as my eyes
falling down to my knees lol and psst my knome they are quiet tonite on the porch. (solar lights that is)
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 03:08
you want my manifesto?
well you ain't getting it, it's a work in continual progress
La La to you too, my dear sparrow, yenti, friend and occasional conscience.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Kailashana2
Fri, 2011-10-07 08:38
Ian!!! Seven shades of shit?
Ian!!! Seven shades of shit?
That's a wonderful alliteration if ever I saw/smelled/heard/touched one. You practicing for the weird elf's new challenge? lol.
~A
lou
Fri, 2011-10-07 05:28
Jess
sounds a little bit like one of my angry poems, but it gets all serious right at the end, i'm not dure that the last line fits, no offence meant, i'm you will put me right if i'm wrong.
Lou
Stand tall, be proud to be who you are, give the world the finger!!!!
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 06:30
oh my dear lou,
do you think I expect to dish out the stuff I do and not get some back? Please speak freely at all times.
Yes, it does get serious at the end, bit of a cheap trick really, lead in with some jokes to soften up the reader then hit them with a necessary truth.
I'm not above cheap tricks, never have been.
I guess the real question is, does it work? Not entirely for every reader, as you found it incongruous. Some may have got a wee smile, some might stop, frown slightly and think about it (that's the one I want, but can't control). Some might think it's puerile liberal crap. No accounting.... [grins]
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Kailashana2
Fri, 2011-10-07 07:45
You're getting to be like
You're getting to be like Moonman, throwing everything into your poem but the kitchen sink.
Me, I'd just like to have fucked an elf just once in my lifetime. Or maybe I did, and my life is the result.
;-)
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 08:07
You really think so?
I rather thought that the history of the world from the perspective of elven malice in 17 lines was a modest range. Presumably we have a somewhat different perspective to mortals.
oh, and you have mind and spirit fucked this elf, the physical is just another aspect, ecstatic, true, but so is the rest.
kisskiss
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
magics02
Fri, 2011-10-07 09:19
Oh Anna
Magic cracking up over here. THat line what a hoot and hannie. I got it though.
Your life is not of an elf Anna. More of a Goddess. Maybe a Goddess of the Elven World..smiles to you
sorry elf to barge in on your thing (think I owe you one anyway)
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 09:40
You are right Magics,
Anna is Goddess of Compassion, Engorged Parts and Slithery Bits
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
magics02
Sat, 2011-10-08 01:18
with all
due respect She Is.
magics02
Fri, 2011-10-07 09:16
why all the
f this and f that in here lately? What happened to proper English? Yikes another house is falling:)
flan and flaneury and fluff and fluffer nuffer said here.
I think that crude effing started all this
lmao
tootles for now..
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 09:42
Fuck is proper English,
more English than most English, coming from the Anglos-saxon, not French or Latin.
Grow up and drop the coy act, it is unbecoming of a woman of your age.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-07 14:21
the etymology is more questionable than your hypocrisy,
lighten up, boyo!
Causes people to leave Neopoet? Crikey! I know you can't be serious, but am a having a little difficulty finding the humour without assuming you are mocking a mutual friend.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
magics02
Sat, 2011-10-08 01:26
Thanks for that
It is okay Efee should I have expected a bed of roses answer? lmao
one
two
three
strikes you're out at the ole' ball game:)
ps crackerjacks:)
magics02
Sat, 2011-10-08 01:25
Your insults - my coy-ote
Makes me laugh
I grew up when you taught me how to write and share respect eh?
IF ONLY... you elfkins would'nt mess with me muse
toodles and a hoot in annie's
magics02
Sat, 2011-10-08 01:23
In the
Literary world of great poets name one that used that word in their profound writings. My age is young at 9 x 6 almost 3
greeneyes
Fri, 2011-10-07 18:52
wow
Fucking Awesome!
Much Love,
Elizabeth
weirdelf
Sat, 2011-10-08 05:57
ta
Elizabeth
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Sat, 2011-10-08 05:58
it sings al right
Friggin in the riggin... "
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Sun, 2011-10-09 02:20
my dear Yenti, everyone has a language boundary,
some accept cursing whilst bridling at the scatological, others find that acceptable and fuck not so. Even Eph objects to cunt. So whose boundary is correct?
No rules, no masters.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Sun, 2011-10-09 18:21
Rhyme!
We're going to give meter a rest for a while and have a look at rhyme.
Coming soon to a screen near you,
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
William Saint George
Thu, 2011-10-20 12:36
I must say...
I don't know what to say about this. Definitely not what I think of when I hear "elf".
Sorry, I'm a biased Tolkiener. :D
But this is indeed a refreshing read. I still am disappointed though; I wish there was more depth to it.
No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot
http://www.wsgeorge.com/
weirdelf
Thu, 2011-10-20 13:10
I understand your disappointment
I like my poems to have impact and make a statement about my politics and the world. This one was more of a rant. Like you I think elves Tolkein and it shits me to tears when people refer to 'santas little helpers'.
Maybe I should leave out the last line or expand it more.
I appreciate your critique.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
IKnowNoBox
Tue, 2012-04-10 11:45
I just had a swell time reading,
In ink,
Dabbler
Candlewitch
Tue, 2012-04-10 12:01
NO!
please don't change the last lines of this piece! I think the late seriousness turning makes the piece brilliant.
To swear or not swear in poetry... I think it comes down to the call of the poet and the poem. There are no set rules except in certain styles, right?
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
loved
Tue, 2012-04-10 12:30
WTF...I have observed,all the fucks,maximum come as comments
.I have observed,
all the fucks,
maximum come as comments
for this most honoured,
gifted poet here
and
all comments more than double up
as he is kind enough
to reply to each one of us,
something
all poets on this site
ought to emulate ..
WTFs am I saying?
"Fuck" is an English word that is considered vulgar. In its most literal meaning, it refers to the act of sexual intercourse. By extension it may be used to negatively characterize anything that can be dismissed, disdained, defiled, or destroyed and may also be used as an intensive.
"Fuck" =====
can often be used as a verb, adverb, adjective, imperative, interjection, and noun. It has various metaphorical meanings. To be "fucked" can mean to be cheated (e.g., "I got fucked by a scam artist"), or to be broken or ruined (e.g., "my computer is fucked") as well as to be sexually penetrated. As a noun, "a fuck" or "a fucker" may describe a contemptible person. "A fuck" may mean an act of copulation. The word can be used as an interjection, and its participle is sometimes used as a strong (not necessarily negative) emphatic. The verb to fuck may be used transitively or intransitively, and it appears in compounds, including fuck off, fuck you, fuck up, and fuck with. In less explicit usages (but still regarded as vulgar), fuck or fuck with can mean to mess around, or to deal with unfairly or harshly. In a phrase such as "don't give a fuck", the word is the equivalent of "damn", in the sense of something having little value. In "what the fuck?!", it serves merely as an intensive. If something is very abnormal or annoying, "this is fucked up!" may be used.
loved
Kailashana2
Tue, 2012-04-10 12:40
Here's the best video on the
Here's the best video on the usage of the word *fuck*. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D7rWLzloOI