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Solitude
Silence, you are so profound
You surround me in a void
where the only sounds I hear
are of yester years
now rising from their grave
with shrouds
I am haunted by those sounds
in the silence of my dorms
which have neither doors
nor windows
Their echoes now dance
in the cockles of my heart
till they take a bow
through my eyes..
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
scribbler
Sun, 2011-03-20 18:00
Hi raj
Indeed so often in times of silent solitude we all replay the past and are too often haunted by our mistakes. I enjoyed this and have but 1 suggestion :which have neither doors might sound better..............stan
raj
Sun, 2011-03-20 23:19
Hi Stan
thank you for the read and your comment which is spot on in the context of the theme of his write...thanks too for your suggestion which i will get done iommediately...
good to see your name on the Ballot...
warmly...
raj (sublime_ocean)
mand
Mon, 2011-03-21 15:19
Hi Raj
Yester year's memories. "rising from their grave with shrouds", thoughts/memories that echo around our minds and then they are gone until the next time. This is a very relatable poem.
Thanks for sharing Raj
Love Mand xxxxxx
mand
Mon, 2011-03-21 15:19
Hi Raj
Yester year's memories. "rising from their grave with shrouds", thoughts/memories that echo around our minds and then they are gone until the next time. This is a very relatable poem.
Thanks for sharing Raj
Love Mand xxxxxx
raj
Mon, 2011-03-21 15:26
Hi Mand...
thanks for the read and appreciating the essence of the poem through your comment..good to see you after a while...
much love..
raj (sublime_ocean)
ziggy
Mon, 2011-03-21 16:11
hey there
now this i like a lot
"Silence, you are so profound
You surround me in a void
where the only sounds I hear
are of yester years
now rising from their grave
with shrouds" and also like
this "I am hounded by those sounds
in the silence of my dorms", especially your use of ' dorms'
good write really like the way this sounds ,,,,,,,zigs
I salute anyone who breaks the rules in the interest of art and great poetry writing just as much as I admire poets who craft meter and verse within the confines of good grammar. Walk the tight rope or jump from it and see if you can fly.
raj
Mon, 2011-03-21 23:15
Hi Zigs...
so rare for you to visit my page ,,,thank you for the read and your appreciative comment...good to know you enjoyed the use of the word "dorms"... i used it in the context of multiple deep seated memories in the mind space...
raj (sublime_ocean)
raj
Tue, 2011-03-22 14:16
Dearest Shirl...
thanks for the read and your comment..it is indeed about being haunted by deep seated memories which surface during soltude...
much love..
raj (sublime_ocean)
Roscoe Lane
Tue, 2011-03-22 05:36
Great,
Great to read and absorb, nice poem. Well written Regards Roscoe..
Roscoe Llane,
Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.
raj
Tue, 2011-03-22 14:17
Hi Roscoe
its quite unusual to get your comment..perhaps it is because you found this write to be worthy of your comment....thank you for the read...good to know you found it absorbing..
warm regards...
raj (sublime_ocean)
Pixee
Fri, 2011-03-25 09:37
Hello raj
A great read. I enjoyed it very much. It is well puzzled together. A 5 star if we had stars. Great job!
Cheers,
Pixee
raj
Fri, 2011-03-25 14:45
Thanks Pixie for the read and
Thanks Pixie for the read and your encouraging and appreciative comment...
Cheers to you too...
raj (sublime_ocean)
raj
Sat, 2011-03-26 15:12
Dearest JayCee
thank you for the read...good to know you felt touched by the write...
good to see your name on the ballot....
much love..
raj (sublime_ocean)