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"Home"
I shall write in mornings glow,
would you walk with me there,
things I need to know.
if the world is the same,
for you as it is for me.
A lovely place for poets to be
They sometimes make me cry.
I have searched for many a day,
To stop those tears in my eyes.
I want to find a trace of your light,
It was not fair you know.
A trail gone cold in my sight
To walk that extra mile.
As I just wanted to be with you,
To see your beautiful smile.
To all that you know
Take care out there.
I will wait for you as all time will go,
In this place I call Home.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words:
Waiting for some first words from our poets????
Editing stage:
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Comments
scribbler
Wed, 2014-04-30 23:31
Hi
There are poems which for some reason touch my heart. This is one such and it is aggravating that I can't tell you specifically Why..............stan
Ian.T
Thu, 2014-05-01 03:14
Stan
Thanks for your visit, yes this one is a mystery, it to me seems to indicate someone we love yet is at a distance where we will once again see them when we reach our inevitable Home, some of these are like auto writing and come from some place deep,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
raj
Thu, 2014-05-01 02:34
Ian
As Stan has commented before me, I too find this very touching and sentimental. Thanks for posting. I liked the rhyme and sequence.
Regards,
raj (sublime_ocean)
Ian.T
Thu, 2014-05-01 03:16
raj
A place to wait for those left behind when we journey on, thanks for your visit,
Take care out there, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
loved
Thu, 2014-05-01 22:53
To walk that extra mile.
and add on a 's''' to make it smile
sentimental
as we reach or tend to reach the path breaking distant horizon
for newer foundations
in greater hope
Ian I see you still love
the past
do cling on it helps attaining salvation
loved
loved
Fri, 2014-05-02 13:14
how is this Ian
Sentimental
Inspired by Ian
since posted in stream
loved
Ian.T
Fri, 2014-05-02 03:47
Loved
Thanks for your two comments, and the new write,
Sort the new write post it on stream,
Keep the compliments on my poem,
Then everything will be a dream,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
loved
Fri, 2014-05-02 13:13
thanks for holding it
as this site has no means to hold drafts
one poetry 24 hours
I have removed the original
thanks Ians
loved